happy birthday

How do hold onto something that's gone?How do make something that’s finished go on?How do you get through the day pretending you're fine?How can you light candles that will no longer shine?How do you smile about something that makes you feel sad?How do you try to feel happy when you still feel so bad?How do you begin to put aside all of your fears?How do you get through the day without tears?How do you think they'd recognise you now you've changed so much?How do you embrace someone you can no longer touch?How do you put on face and say you're okay?How can you ever take this pain away?How can we be us if you can't be here?How can I keep you close when you can't be near?How can I show you if you cannot see?How can we be us if I'm not quite me?How can I show you I care today?How can I do it and what can I say?Would it make a difference if I even tried?Is it even your birthday now that you've died?How can I say the word 'happy' today?How can I be happy now you've been taken away?How can this word feel so out of place?How can I be happy if I can't see your face?Maybe the years will soften and then,I can feel happy on your birthday again.Until that time I don't know what to say.All I've got is that I love you whatever the day.