LIFE AS A WIDOWER

A story of grief by a man and a boy

six months

Next Friday will be the six month anniversary of my wife’s untimely death. It simultaneously means both everything and nothing to me. Everything because I can’t believe how much our … Continue reading

May 1, 2013 · 157 Comments

babes’ mouths

Well yesterday took me by surprise. I’ve been telling people how I’m dreading Jackson’s friends getting to that age where they start to compare themselves to others around them. That … Continue reading

April 30, 2013 · 8 Comments

tank engines

This is a guest post by writer, journalist and blogger, Emma Beddington …but first an introduction from me I don’t usually interfere with guest posts by weaving in my own … Continue reading

April 12, 2013 · Leave a comment

the apprentice

New feelings have taken hold of me this weekend. Untold pain from running up steep hills in the biting cold at a 10K race in Greenwich Park on Saturday morning. … Continue reading

April 7, 2013 · 6 Comments

you’re her

Many years ago my maternal grandmother explained to me how she saw life and death. I was probably no more than ten when she asked me to walk over to … Continue reading

March 31, 2013 · 12 Comments

progress review

This is a third guest post by my two-year-old son, Jackson Bo Brooks-Dutton. In Jackson’s third post, he shares news of his latest nursery progress review – the first since … Continue reading

March 21, 2013 · 6 Comments

true friendship

I’m closing this week with a little sense of pride and achievement. It’s hard to feel any truly positive emotions right now, but when they are driven by the happiness … Continue reading

March 17, 2013 · 5 Comments

daddy’s books

This is a guest post by Elke Barber Elke is a self-employed graphic designer and the author of Is Daddy Coming Back in a Minute?, a fully-illustrated children’s book explaining (sudden) death … Continue reading

March 14, 2013 · 8 Comments

old habits

I went back to work yesterday. You may feel like you’ve read these words from me before, but last time it was just too soon. I wasn’t in a good … Continue reading

March 13, 2013 · 13 Comments

grief cycle

On 22nd December 2012, my son drew this picture on an envelope with a ballpoint pen. “What’s that, darling?” I asked. “It Mummy”, he replied. ‘Then it’s a keeper’, I … Continue reading

March 9, 2013 · 9 Comments

parental guidance

This is a second guest post by my two-year-old son, Jackson Bo Brooks-Dutton In Jackson’s second post, he shares with us what he really (maybe) means when he throws himself … Continue reading

March 7, 2013 · 10 Comments

mother’s day

A number of people have asked me what I’m planning to do for Mother’s Day this year. It’s an easy one to answer for me. I’m going to buy my … Continue reading

February 25, 2013 · 13 Comments

rock stars

Last night I learnt why rock stars smash up hotel rooms. It’s because they can. It works for them on so many levels. It gets them the attention they need … Continue reading

February 20, 2013 · 4 Comments

dramatic emotions

This an archive post, which I first published this time last year after running the Brighton Half Marathon. I’m participating again tomorrow to raise funds for the child bereavement charity Winston’s Wish. Please … Continue reading

February 18, 2013 · 9 Comments

new words

Many widows and widowers speak of the uncomfortable ‘widowy’ moments they’ve experienced since losing their spouse. Like when they realised a friend had crossed the road to avoid them just … Continue reading

February 15, 2013 · 18 Comments

my son

This is a very special guest post by my two-year-old son, Jackson Bo Brooks-Dutton Toddler, train enthusiast and part time nursery attendee, Jackson Bo Brooks-Dutton, shares his thoughts on his … Continue reading

February 12, 2013 · 30 Comments

guest posts

Monday 3rd February will mark four weeks since lifeasawidower.com launched. In that short space of time the blog has already seen a quarter of a million views, connected many widowers … Continue reading

February 1, 2013 · 10 Comments

accepting help

Lots of people have asked me if I’m getting help and, only as I type the words, I’ve just realised that a person posing such a question may be asking … Continue reading

January 31, 2013 · 11 Comments

strange intuition

Today is my mother-in-law’s 60th birthday. A day she has been planning since she turned 50. We had big plans. A party with all her friends and family followed by … Continue reading

January 30, 2013 · 9 Comments

woman trouble

It’s hard to imagine a two-year-old boy already experiencing problems with the opposite sex, but we are having some serious woman trouble. My son, who has always been fiercely loyal … Continue reading

January 29, 2013 · 12 Comments

tough day

It would probably be easy to read my posts and think, ‘Isn’t he doing well?’ so I feel I need to be honest. If I only write when I feel … Continue reading

January 24, 2013 · 29 Comments

want mummy

For such a small chap, it seems strange to me that my son has become the elephant in the room. People seem comfortable checking how I am, but it’s often … Continue reading

January 14, 2013 · 32 Comments

poor daddy

I made a mistake when Desreen first died. I tried to hide my grief from my son thinking that he wouldn’t suffer so much if I seemed happy and kept … Continue reading

January 10, 2013 · 18 Comments

grieving toddlers

Go and try to find some information on toddler grief that will make you feel better about the death of your infant child’s mummy. And let me know when you … Continue reading

January 8, 2013 · 27 Comments