A young widowed father opening up about living with loss
It has been a while but I woke up this morning with words in my head that I wanted to pass onto friends who have lost someone they love.
How do you deal with a life cut so short?
How do you handle the shock and the hurt?
How do you find reason when there’s none to be found?
How do you steady yourself when you’ve lost your ground?
The truth is you do,
And the truth is you don’t.
The truth is you will,
And truth is you won’t.
Because how can your feelings ever end?
How can you ever lose loss when you’ve lost a friend?
How can you make all the pain go away?
When the pain reflects the love that will always stay.
And would you let that love be taken if someone offered?
Would you put the memories in a forgetting box if somebody proffered?
Would you have all the good times taken away?
If the hurt could be healed is that a price you would pay?
I’m sorry the only comfort I can offer is cold,
A reworking of cliches that I was once told:
That love turns to grief when someone is gone,
And that darkness descends over light that once shone.
But when someone you loved shone their light onto you,
And when the person you grieve for loved you back, too,
Then their loss becomes a shadow abruptly thrown,
A much darker shadow than even your own.
And some days you’ll be happy again,
Some days you might even be glad of the pain,
Because it’ll let you know that you still feel,
It’ll tell you you’re alive and that you’re still real.
And it can be hard to accept that you’re still here,
Without that someone you love and need so near,
And I wish I could conjure words to make this end,
The hurt that you’re feeling in losing a friend.
But the truth is my words probably can’t yet be taken,
Like medicine that won’t settle while your world is so shaken.
But if only my words could make you feel better,
Then I’d keep on writing and I’d write forever.